Nautical terms used by sailors, I think?

[Jeannette]

Sailor-types speak a whole 'nother language from the rest of us. The following should help you understand the gist of their conversation. Most are relatively unimportant. However, see "sink", below.

ABAFT -- what you can take only in the most luxurious cabins

ABEAM -- a large length of metal, supporting something like a deck or a wall

ABOARD -- same as abeam, but made of wood

AFT -- anyplace behind the bow

ATHWARTS -- cross between foot fungus and growths on hands; caused by handling or walking on very active toads

AYE AYE -- expression of surprise, usually followed by "cheewawa"

BEARING -- what goes on around the pool

BERTH -- what you hope does not go on around the pool; also a parking spot for the ship. You have to look very carefully to see the lines painted on the water.

BOW -- bend over in honor; also pointy end of ship, usually passes through the water before the rest of the ship

BRIDGE -- where the Captain rants and rails when he gets stern

BULKHEAD -- very large restroom

CABIN -- closet-like space costing $300 per day, used for sleeping and not much else

COURSE -- what the Navigator is studying in his spare time at night school, hoping to figure out what an astrolabe or a sextant is

DAVIT -- killed Goliath, never went to sea

DECK -- 52 cards, used in casinos

DISEMBARK -- get off the Ark; a good example of just how old most nautical lingo is

DOCK -- member of ship's crew caring for passenger's health

DRAFT -- type of beer served in ship's bar

EMBARK -- get on the Ark

FATHOM -- measure of water depth, somewhere between 6 inches and 20 feet

FREEBOARD -- see abeam and aboard; this one costs nothing

FOR'ARD -- not a Mercury or Lincoln

FUNNEL -- the only place on the ship where you should see smoke, other than the bar; see stack

GALLEY -- where the slaves sit and row, or, in the case of modern ships, turn the screws

GANGWAY -- ramp where groups (gangs) of salespeople await the ship's passengers

HAWSER -- passenger from Indiana

HEAD -- something like a scuttlebutt or scupper, but with running water

HELM -- southern senator; also steering wheel

HULL -- outside portion of a nut

JACOBS LADDER -- song popular at camp

KEEL -- barnacle collector; don't worry, you can't see it, so don't expect to be invited to admire the ship's collection

KNOT -- not a mile-per-hour, but a little more

LATITUDE -- what the Captain will NOT give his crew, when he is stern, or ranting and railing

LEEWARD -- in the direction of Atwater, Petty, Greenwood, or Harvey Oswald

LINE -- what can get you in good with that blonde in the bar

LOG -- tree, lying down; could become aboard

LONGITUDE -- like latitude, but longer

MASTER -- another term for the Captain; don't pronounce it Massa', or he may get stern

NAUTICAL MILE -- not a real mile; too far to swim to shore

PITCH -- what the ship's bow does in rough weather; what the passengers do, on the other hand, includes the word "throw"

PORT -- favorite nautical wine; also means "left" (both words have four letters, a mnemonic device useful to many); also city with ship berths, designed to create a giant sucking sound in the vicinity of your wallet

PORTHOLE -- the entry to a harbor; OK, it really means a small window that costs an extra $100 per day, but how funny is that?

QUAY -- another word for dock; arguing about the proper pronunciation can pass hours (kway? kay? key? kwie? who knows?)

RAILING -- what the Captain does when he gets stern; same as ranting

ROLL -- small bread served in dining room; also another motion of the ship in rough weather, but greatly reduced by stabilizers

SCREWS -- propellers; apparently turned by slaves in galley

SCUPPER -- drain at the edge of a deck, to allow water to run off; if water is running in, see "sink"

SKIPPER -- slang term for a flying fish, or a flat stone

SINK -- unless there is a huge amount of frantic activity on deck, large stainless steel unit in the kitchen; also, to quote Bill Dana (Jose Jimenez), "Oh, I hope not!"

STABILIZER -- device to counteract ship's roll; several umbrella drinks will have the opposite effect, in case you want to experiment with what cruises were like before the invention of stabilizers

STACK -- refers to pancakes, funnels, or girls around the pool

STARBOARD -- like aboard, but pointing at the night sky; also means "right", which has absolutely no mnemonic relationship, so no one remembers it without thinking about "port" first

STATEROOM -- cabin where you can lie in state

STERN -- the Captain, when the crew acts like the crew of the Love Boat; also the roundy (or, on modern cruise ships, squarish) end of the ship. Usually passes through the water after the rest of ship.

TENDER -- how your skin will feel after the first day on a Caribbean cruise; also small boat to take passengers ashore, making them wonder why their port taxes are not being used to construct a dock with cruise ship berths

WAKE -- what you won't want to do at 6 a.m., if you attended the midnight buffet

WEIGH ANCHOR -- complicated operation involving very large scales, necessary before every ship's departure

WINDLASS -- completely still; no wind

YARDARM -- important ship feature, determining if it's time for a rum.

Hope this has made some of you smile. I did

Jeannette

[Pete Croft]

You have left out "Gronicle". Reputedly only manufactured in naval bronze, to imperial measurements.
Useful when you need to send some irritating crew member on a fools errand to the chandler. As in "Son, I need you to go pick up a 3 and 1/4 inch, left hand thread starboard gronicle".
Keep a straight face when you say it, and save the ROFLAO until junior returns ;-)

Pete

[Mike]

Pete, the 'gronicle' sounds very much like the famed 'golden rivet', said to have been the very last rivet installed in manufacturing each aircraft. One airline I flew for introduced new hosties by telling them it was traditional for new crew to kiss that beautiful golden rivet, torch in hand, and in a rear inspection bay. This necessitated them crawling through a rather awkward, floor-level, door.

I leave you to imagine the rest. These days, we could get arrested for what was commonplace - and usually taken in the very best of humour - back then. I sometimes wonder if things have changed for the better, though I suppose they have generally. Nonetheless, this PC thing gets right up my nose at times.

Has the term 'old b*****d' - as in "Gidday, you old b*****d!" - ceased to be a term of endearment in everyday use Down Under, I ask myself? Sorry thing indeed if it has. Such colourful, and invariably friendly, vernacular is the very essence of what differentiates us one 'tribe' from another. Oh, that global melting pot. How boring the world may become whilst we pursue homogeneity.

Regards

Mike

[Audrey S]

Here's a few you missed;

Dinghy -- The noise a ship's bell makes.

Superstructure-- A structure thats very super.

Spurlash -- The noise an anchor makes when it hits the water.

[Clip]

Love it, though I have nothing to add, at least at present.